The sad state of things never seems to end these days. I have frequently come across the "childfree" movement online. Like landmines, these blogs lie in wait-- I'm searching for some commonplace topic on Google and wham! a "child free by choice" blog. Well good for you lady, is all I think and then usually move on.
Today I was in a curious mood and perused one of these sites. Oh dear. It seems many ever-childless people who make a conscious effort not to have kids call people with children "breeders." Once again I am reduced to the status of livestock! One page had a whole list of "good reasons" why people choose not to have kids, most of them being ecological. Another posted a list of retorts for people who ask nosy questions about why one doesn't have kids.
Now I have to confess, I left harassing messages on most of the blogs I found (shame on me). I know, dear readers, many of you are thinking "But Sarah, that is their choice." Sure, I find their choice rather selfish but according to the list the proper response to that is that I'm being selfish for unleashing more resource consumers on the world.
But people, they are clamoring for rights! How come every kind of personal choice requires activism? Rights for the intentionally childless? Oh please! There are lots of supposed rights I'd like because I chose to live in Kentucky, send my husband through school, or work as a writer. I can see it now: the Defense League for those Who Ghost Write, Live in Rural America, and Help Educate a Spouse. Kinda catchy.
I know these folks are confident their 401ks alone will take care of them when they are old; however when inflation has ruined them financially I hope my kids are around to forgive their nastiness, help them by paying taxes, and perhaps give them just a little kick in the shins when no one is looking.
(Read "A Stroke of Good Fortune" for Flannery O'Connor's perspective on people who are terrified of children.)
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Thursday, November 12, 2009
S.P.M. hearts S.D.
"Give her some funked up music, she treats you nice
Feed her some hungry reggae, she'll love you twice
The girls don't seem to care tonight
As long as the mood is right
No static at all
FM, no static at all." -Steely Dan
When I was a child there was a Steely Dan CD rattling around in my parents collection. While systematically checking out all of their music I came across it and was taken by the song "Deacon Blues." It is about a free wheeling saxophonist and his live fast, die young philosophy. Why I thought this was so great as a third grader, I don't remember.
Steely Dan haunted me from then on. It didn't take many conversations about the duo before I learned being their fan wasn't something you talked about-- the criticisms seemed harsh and unnecessary. Was a smooth sound so bad? Was bringing rock and jazz into a harmonious pop sound so evil?
After realizing I didn't want to be one of "those people"-- the kind that control their old-school musical tastes to what is totally ironic at the time (aka the indie sheep)-- I relaxed and enjoyed.
So a few days ago I heard them live for the first time. It is risky paying money to see a band known for their studio recording perfection, but it was well worth it. My sister graciously accompanied me and didn't look too embarrassed when I was dancing in my seat. The guitar solos, the brass, the cheeky back up singers all brought my favorites to life. And to see a theater full of other fans, many of them young women like myself, confirmed I was not alone in my appreciation for the static-free styling of Steely Dan.
Feed her some hungry reggae, she'll love you twice
The girls don't seem to care tonight
As long as the mood is right
No static at all
FM, no static at all." -Steely Dan
When I was a child there was a Steely Dan CD rattling around in my parents collection. While systematically checking out all of their music I came across it and was taken by the song "Deacon Blues." It is about a free wheeling saxophonist and his live fast, die young philosophy. Why I thought this was so great as a third grader, I don't remember.
Steely Dan haunted me from then on. It didn't take many conversations about the duo before I learned being their fan wasn't something you talked about-- the criticisms seemed harsh and unnecessary. Was a smooth sound so bad? Was bringing rock and jazz into a harmonious pop sound so evil?
After realizing I didn't want to be one of "those people"-- the kind that control their old-school musical tastes to what is totally ironic at the time (aka the indie sheep)-- I relaxed and enjoyed.
So a few days ago I heard them live for the first time. It is risky paying money to see a band known for their studio recording perfection, but it was well worth it. My sister graciously accompanied me and didn't look too embarrassed when I was dancing in my seat. The guitar solos, the brass, the cheeky back up singers all brought my favorites to life. And to see a theater full of other fans, many of them young women like myself, confirmed I was not alone in my appreciation for the static-free styling of Steely Dan.
Being a Good Citizen... blah blah blah
In college I claimed to be apolitical. In truth I was too distracted by other things to care much. Bush made me nauseous, starting the war in Iraq seemed pointless, the House and Senate looked like a two ring circus.
Not much has changed. Now Obama makes me nauseous, escalating the war in Afghanistan seems pointless, and the House and Senate.... well that really hasn't changed. But I've decided to have a go at being involved, thinking it may be part of my responsibility as a citizen after all.
The proposed national health care plan, what a topic these days. Some say its about time, others say it'll be our ruin. The Catholic Church said, whatever it is it can't include abortion coverage. I agree. It is bad enough my tax dollars have to go to killing people overseas and sacrificing our military-- I'd really rather that it not go to fund more killing at home. As I've said before, the abortion industry in America has such implicit racist and classist overtones that I don't know how any person with a heart could support it with more federal money, even if many do believe an unborn child is not a person with rights.
So I called my congressman about the recently passed Stupak-Pitts Amendment, rallied some friends and family to do the same, and was pleased when it passed the House. Planned Parenthood saying the USCB "hijacked" the health care bill is just silly. And really, the bishops are great but give the Catholic people their due credit. They didn't have to tell me to call, I did it on my own. I just think it is funny that when Catholics help vote in PP's preferred candidate for president they are called open-minded, and now that those same people are speaking their minds about abortion they are compared to terrorists. Not the "fair mindedness" Obama called us all to, is it?
"Picket lines, sister
And picket signs, sister
Don't punish me with brutality
Come on talk to me, sister
So you can see
What's going on."
-Marvin Gaye
Not much has changed. Now Obama makes me nauseous, escalating the war in Afghanistan seems pointless, and the House and Senate.... well that really hasn't changed. But I've decided to have a go at being involved, thinking it may be part of my responsibility as a citizen after all.
The proposed national health care plan, what a topic these days. Some say its about time, others say it'll be our ruin. The Catholic Church said, whatever it is it can't include abortion coverage. I agree. It is bad enough my tax dollars have to go to killing people overseas and sacrificing our military-- I'd really rather that it not go to fund more killing at home. As I've said before, the abortion industry in America has such implicit racist and classist overtones that I don't know how any person with a heart could support it with more federal money, even if many do believe an unborn child is not a person with rights.
So I called my congressman about the recently passed Stupak-Pitts Amendment, rallied some friends and family to do the same, and was pleased when it passed the House. Planned Parenthood saying the USCB "hijacked" the health care bill is just silly. And really, the bishops are great but give the Catholic people their due credit. They didn't have to tell me to call, I did it on my own. I just think it is funny that when Catholics help vote in PP's preferred candidate for president they are called open-minded, and now that those same people are speaking their minds about abortion they are compared to terrorists. Not the "fair mindedness" Obama called us all to, is it?
"Picket lines, sister
And picket signs, sister
Don't punish me with brutality
Come on talk to me, sister
So you can see
What's going on."
-Marvin Gaye
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Baby #2
Today my midwife came over for my first appointment. The baby's heart rate sounds great (a happy little swoosh swoosh) and I seem to be in good shape. Having a home visit is so nice, a very personal alternative to the clinic I went to last time. She gave me the green light to start running again, and the midwife was hardly out the door before I had on my shoes and was out for a jog.
I am just out of my first trimester so it will be another 6 months of leg cramps, stomach troubles, and the like. But as long as we are healthy and the birth goes well I have nothing to complain about.
I am just out of my first trimester so it will be another 6 months of leg cramps, stomach troubles, and the like. But as long as we are healthy and the birth goes well I have nothing to complain about.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Halloween: Part II
Forget my last post: one of my favorite contributors to First Things has put all my thoughts into words better than I ever could have. Enjoy.
The Drama of Hallowmas by Sally Thomas
The Drama of Hallowmas by Sally Thomas
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Halloween
So shoot me, I like Halloween. In college my "power encounter" professor (its like an evangelical Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher) told me it was unhealthy to like such a demonized day and fellow classmates told me I was "playing with fire" to recognize the 31st at all. Really?
Yesterday afternoon Lucy and I took a walk down town to buy a pie pumpkin. It was dreary outside, just a little cold. Birds picked morsels out of people's dead gardens, leaves sat heaped up in piles by the curb, the air felt colder than it had before. The earth dies, in part, during the Fall. We can talk about the happy circle of life all we want: there is something a little spooky about walking around on a gloomy afternoon in autumn seeing this kind of decay.
Halloween is the eve of All Saints Day. In the church it is a time to remember the saints and those we love who have passed on. We pray for the dead, for a quick journey through purgatory. Now I don't think gore and guts are the way to memorialize the day when we meditate on death. And of course it shouldn't be done fatalistically-- all meditation should be performed with some expectation of our redemption and resurrection. But refusing to take the time on Halloween-- or All Hallows Eve, or Hell-oween or whatever you want to call it-- to think about the inevitable reality of dying seems flippant. And since we do celebrate Christ's victory over death and the joy of those who are with Him now, the candy and costumes are just fine by me too.
Yesterday afternoon Lucy and I took a walk down town to buy a pie pumpkin. It was dreary outside, just a little cold. Birds picked morsels out of people's dead gardens, leaves sat heaped up in piles by the curb, the air felt colder than it had before. The earth dies, in part, during the Fall. We can talk about the happy circle of life all we want: there is something a little spooky about walking around on a gloomy afternoon in autumn seeing this kind of decay.
Halloween is the eve of All Saints Day. In the church it is a time to remember the saints and those we love who have passed on. We pray for the dead, for a quick journey through purgatory. Now I don't think gore and guts are the way to memorialize the day when we meditate on death. And of course it shouldn't be done fatalistically-- all meditation should be performed with some expectation of our redemption and resurrection. But refusing to take the time on Halloween-- or All Hallows Eve, or Hell-oween or whatever you want to call it-- to think about the inevitable reality of dying seems flippant. And since we do celebrate Christ's victory over death and the joy of those who are with Him now, the candy and costumes are just fine by me too.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Trip to DC
We had a great time in DC. The trip out was smooth sailing-- Lucy was a trooper, there were few cars on the road, and we made it there in record time. We took a wrong turn at the hotel and ended up downtown rather than in Virginia where we were staying, but it afforded us a quick drive-through tour of the Capitol's landmarks. With a little room service, baths, and TV in bed we felt plenty refreshed.
The next day was horribly rainy and cold (for us, anyway). Still, Lucy and I made it to the Museum of Natural History and the Museum of American History while Alan was at his conference. Lucy loved the gemstones, the dinosaur bones, and the animal dioramas; the first ladies' dresses, Kermit, and the Hope Diamond were a little less thrilling for her. We turned in early, thoroughly soaked and chilled to the bone.
Sunday was Lucy's birthday. Before my parents came in for a visit we went to the national shrine. What a beautiful church! All the art work I saw is another post in itself. The mass was beautiful as well and it was neat to see so many Catholics from all over the country meeting there to worship.
After my parents arrived and Alan got back from his meetings we partied! Lucy opened her presents, we ate tasty Japanese food, and stayed up late drinking cider and eating apple donuts. I think Lucy enjoyed herself at her makeshift party.
I'm glad we went. After we booked the trip I thought it was a mistake, that maybe we should have sent Alan on his own. But why should he get to travel while we stay at home? I like this arrangement much better: he goes to hear a lecture, me and kids traipse around the city!
The next day was horribly rainy and cold (for us, anyway). Still, Lucy and I made it to the Museum of Natural History and the Museum of American History while Alan was at his conference. Lucy loved the gemstones, the dinosaur bones, and the animal dioramas; the first ladies' dresses, Kermit, and the Hope Diamond were a little less thrilling for her. We turned in early, thoroughly soaked and chilled to the bone.
Sunday was Lucy's birthday. Before my parents came in for a visit we went to the national shrine. What a beautiful church! All the art work I saw is another post in itself. The mass was beautiful as well and it was neat to see so many Catholics from all over the country meeting there to worship.
After my parents arrived and Alan got back from his meetings we partied! Lucy opened her presents, we ate tasty Japanese food, and stayed up late drinking cider and eating apple donuts. I think Lucy enjoyed herself at her makeshift party.
I'm glad we went. After we booked the trip I thought it was a mistake, that maybe we should have sent Alan on his own. But why should he get to travel while we stay at home? I like this arrangement much better: he goes to hear a lecture, me and kids traipse around the city!
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